Author Archive for dr

Friday Face-Offs: “Run To The Hills” – 7th Place

Hmm … a little Swedish style-mix-up, here. (You know how the Swedes like to mess with our minds.) But does it work? On the one hand, it brings out the plaintiveness of the chorus. On the other hand, I can’t imagine 500,000 Brazilians singing along to this at a stadium show …

Even before I got into Iron Maiden, I always liked “Run to the Hills,” because the chorus is so emotionally complicated. (I assume it’s being sung from the perspective of the Cree, right?) It’s also the first piece of pop culture I heard that framed the whole “Cowboys and Indians” thing as an injustice/genocide (to the Indians, that is).

“Murder for freedom a stab in the back /
Women and children and cowards attack”

So in a way, maybe I owe my entire humorless, politically-correct, Oberlin-incubated worldview to … IRON MAIDEN!!!

\m/ Up the irons! Free Mumia! \m/

UPDATE: Ah, someone beat me to it.

Friday Face-Offs: “Run To The Hills” – 8th Place

“Run to the Hills” opens with one of the most famous licks in heavy metal. I guess it’s supposed to sound Native American? Anyway, it’s only appropriate that we kick of this week’s FFO with a tribute to that lick. Let the happy horns of heraldry play!

Hmm. Okay, maybe it would be cool if he played the lick correctly.

Never mind! Let the happy keyboard of heraldry play:

Yeah! Now play both clips at the same time to really set it off right. Friday Face-Offs!!!

Friday Face-Offs!!! IRON MAIDEN EDITION

Hoo boy, what a week! We were seduced by the Iron Maiden … we worked in the wine store … we laughed and loved … and now it’s all over. :–( Nothing but entropy and despair until the cold embrace of the grave.

Oh well! At least we still have FRIDAY FACE-OFFS!

Welcome to the 18th installment of an internet legend.

This week’s FFO is “Run to the Hills” by Iron Maiden.

Man oh man, listen to all those people singing along. That’s amazing. Being in Iron Maiden must be fucking awesome.

Don’t blink … first contestant is coming up next … this is Friday Face-Offs!!!

Goddamn, John McCain Is An Idiot

I haven’t been doing much political blogging recently, and I never blog at night, but I’ll make an exception because of how stupid John McCain is. Look at his dumb-ass twitter page.

“just finished taping an interview with Hannity re: Afghanistan – watch tonight at 9pm.”

SHUT UP. Whatever, gramps.

(Actually, I shouldn’t dog McCain too hard; he’s the core demographic for our latest project… more next week …)

Hidden Oenological Messages In Iron Maiden Lyrics???

Check out 0:44 … very interesting … you don’t even have to spin the record backwards to hear it … LOL, I love the specificity of “red wine,” obviously Bruce Dickinson knows his stuff …

Speaking of which, have I shared this nugget from Wikipedia’s entry on Bruce Dickinson? It goes on about how Dickinson is not only the singer for Iron Maiden, but also a fencing enthusiast and a pilot and all this other stuff, where you’re like, “Damn, this dude is the toughest man of all time,” and then you get this:

“The most recent television programme (Dickinson) has presented was a show on spontaneous human combustion for Sky One called Inside Spontaneous Human Combustion with Bruce Dickinson, in which he investigates the phenomenon of this occurrence by enlisting the help of several experts and performing various experiments to determine its possible cause.”

GAME OVER. Bruce Dickinson WINS. Everyone who is not Bruce Dickinson LOSES.

Things Are Heating Up …

Things are getting hectic at the wine store … two sales within a minute … you know what they say when I’m working the register: “Gone in sixty seconds — OF WINE.”

Come and get it … “666, the number of the beast.” Merlot for life.

Somewhere In Time Cover Trivia

Reader YB chimes in re: my brief mention of the “Somewhere in Time” cover:

your blog post wherein you contemplate the cover of Somewhere In Time is cool, but I think you’re missing out on the fine detail and trivia stuff in that cover — here’s the cover … and here’s the scoop on trivia …

Hmm … looking at the trivia page (“To the right of the clock is a neon sign that reads ‘Ancient Mariner Seafood Restaurant,’ a reference to the song ‘Rime of the Ancient Mariner’ from the Powerslave album”), I just have to wonder … do you think any teenagers ever got stoned on marijuana and spent hours looking at the “Somewhere in Time” album cover? LOL, hmm, I wonder if that ever happened … no, no, it’s just too crazy, that could never happen. What was I thinking with that incredible flight of fancy I just imagined? What teenager in 1986 would ever run home with his brand-new copy of “Somewhere in Time” and then go into his bedroom and put the record on and then roll the fattest joint ever and then open up the album cover and start looking for all the hidden symbols and references? Nobody would ever do that in a million years, because that would definitely not be very fun at all.

For The Doubters

In this photograph, I have paired a 1984 Iron Maiden Powerslave ($1.00) with a 2005 Morey-Saint-Denis Burgundy ($84.99).

Come and get a taste if you’re man enough …

Back In The Store … The Wine Store, That Is

Back in the store for a special Thursday edition of “Wine Store Mondays.”

From what I’ve heard, Thursdays are busy for buyers-of-wine-who-come-to-the-store.

It will take all my concentration and focus to serve these customers with the professionalism they have come to expect.

No worries, though … as I always say: “You take my life but I’ll take yours too.”

Let’s do it, people. Let’s buy an insane amount of wine.