My wife mentioned JMM’s comment below while we were in the midst of a Deadwood marathon last night.

Needless to say it brought “TV time” to a DEAD HALT. I was like, “He wrote what? Why didn’t I see that? I was rocking TPM all day!”

She was like, “He wrote it.”

After the election, in the interests of national reconciliation, I imagine Obama and Biden may allow McCain to make special non-custodial visits to his testicles.

I have NEVER been more tempted to call a new Golden Age! Are you kidding me, I was right on the edge of announcing “FIFTH GOLDEN AGE!” but I held back . . . superhuman self-control . . .

One month left.

MAYBE YOUR GUY IS UP IN THE POLLS and the other guy is looking a little raggedy. So maybe you feel a little less motivated to knock on doors, or phone-bank, or talk to strangers — all of which are, admittedly, the worst, most pain-in-the-ass things in the world.

However, in these final days of the campaign, we must heed the wisdom of our forefathers.

What shall our job be during the next few weeks, O forefathers? What is it you want us to do? Tell us, O forefathers . . .

(If you’re like, ‘I get it, I don’t need to watch the video, I remember this song’ . . . umm, no, actually you need to watch this video. Just watch. Watch this video. Because, are you kidding me? LOL is all you can say to this video. NOW GET PUMPED AND GET READY TO HANDLE YOUR BUSINESS. You need to be knocking on doors like John Bonham.)

ONE MONTH LEFT.

BRING IT ON HOME.

That’s the impression I’m starting to get. I can’t keep up with all the gold being panned over yonder at TPM creek. I’m trying to assay the claim but there are so many gold nuggets I keep getting blinded. (Tee-hee, now I know how Rich Lowry feels when that weird lady from Alaska starts talking.)

Tomorrow’s Friday and you know what that means!

Here are the links to the previous FRIDAY FACE-OFFS to get you excited . . .

WEEK ONE: “Umbrella”

WEEK TWO: “The Suffering”

WEEK THREE: “Fortunate Son”

FRIDAY FACE-OFF TEASER, a.k.a. “Overhead At Friday Face-Offs”:

“Now usually I don’t do this, but go ahead and break ’em off a little preview of the remix.”

NOTE: I AM LOOKING FOR SPONSORS FOR FRIDAY FACE-OFFS. WEEKLY OR MONTHLY OR YEARLY (YOU PAY BIG BUCKS FOR THAT LAST OPTION). LET ME KNOW IF YOU OR YOUR COMPANY OR YOUR POLITICAL CAMPAIGN IS INTERESTED.

LOL, have you seen the “hot new web redesign” over at theatlatlantic.com?

Are you kidding me? They weren’t even NEAR the top of my list of “blogs this blog will destroy,” and yet they’re already running scared with this desperation play!

Are you kidding me? Is that IMPACT font I see? Are you serious, they’re trying to bite the font made famous by ME??? (See cover of my new book if you doubt me.)

LOL, way to go theatlantic.com, yes you can smell fear on the internet.

MUST ATTRIBUTE . . . PARENTAL WARNING . . . ADULT CONTENT . . . SIRENS FLASHING . . .

Look at all the comics! What were they thinking?

Here’s an EXCLUSIVE poem about the book:

Everybody buy fifty copies of this book
Not forty; not thirty
Twenty copies won’t do, nor ten
It must be fifty
Fifty copies ONLY
Fifty
Must be bought
Your only option

Won’t you support poetry by buying fifty copies of this book today?