Bill O’Reilly at the Radio & Television Correspondents Association Dinner:

(From here.)

I hope this spirals out of control as quickly as possible.

Bill would reduce deficits by $130B over 10 years. How about we pass it?

A friendship forged in fire … and still burning strong.

St. Patrick’s Day and a horse walk into a bar. The bartender says, “What can I do for you?” The horse says, “I’d like a pint of hay.” The bartender gives the horse a pint of hay. Then the bartender turns to St. Patrick’s Day and says, “What would you like?” and then St. Patrick’s Day says, “I’d like everyone to get drunk!!!”

What did the leprechaun say to the ghost? “Shiver me timbers!” (Say in Irish accent)

What kind of car does St. Patrick drive? A Prius … because it’s “green.”

How can you tell if a leprechaun is sad? He turns from green to blue.

Why do Irish people come to our country and steal our jobs? Because they love our GREEN money.

O’Connor and O’Guinness are walking down a country lane when they see O’Donnell sitting on a stone with a tear in his eye. “Why are ye weeping then, O’Donnell?” asks O’Connor. “Alas, my heart is broken, O’Connor,” replies O’Donnell. “And why is ye heart broken, O’Donnell?” asks O’Guinness. O’Donnell sobs and says, “Because a leprechaun gave me a social disease.”

Why is St. Patrick’s Day like the band Green Day? BECAUSE THEY BOTH SUCK. (Just kidding … they’re both great.)

What’s the difference between a leprechaun and a goat? One has a pot of gold and the other eats old tin cans.

What’s the best thing to drink on St. Patrick’s Day? Bud Light, because it has the best St. Patrick’s Day banners and because it tastes great.

What did famous Irish comedian Yakov O’Smirnoff say when he fell into a huge vat of Guinness? “In Ireland, Guinness drinks YOU.“

Text your answer to AT&T: 230962 / “Paddy’s Day Fight”
VS.

Now the truth can be told … last week I ran a micro-Yaddo (artist’s colony in an abandoned castle?) out of my house.

When blog reader and Cannonball Press co-founder Mike Houston needed a temporary studio in which make a big-ass drawing of a man-of-war ship that is also a pipe organ, there was only one choice that made sense …

Needless to say, CASA MNFTIU was able to provide the open space, natural light, gigantic drafting table, and weird home-cooked whole-wheat cornbread that the discerning visual artist requires for maximal productivity.

Wait until you see this drawing in the huge filigreed golden frame Mike has ordered for it. You’re gonna have a total OMG.

MNFTIU Micro Yaddo = 1, Haters = 0.

Dude they’re letting me drink a glass of wine WHILE I WORK THE CASH REGISTER … aka “COME GET YOUR FREE MONEY” … just kidding, I’m a total pro on the ol’ “Cash-Reg” in fact I’m known in certain circles as “Cash-money Reggie,” because that kinda sounds like “Cash Register,” the machine I’m working while I drink this nice Italian red wine.