Olympics Liveblogging, Part I

8:28 PM: Demus just smoked the rest for breakfast! “You put in the work early, you can relax late.” -NBC analyst. She moves on to the next heat.

8:27 PM: And they’re off

8:25 PM: Now we’re watching Lashinda Demus about to compete in the 400M hurdles. The same race we just watched?! Umm, who’s in charge here? Okay, my friend just explained there are multiple heats for each race before the main race. BANG

8:24 PM: Wow, BIG Olympic flame this year! One of the biggest I’ve ever seen. Respect to whatever city is hosting this year’s Olys.

8:22 PM: Now we’re having a contest to see who can do the best Roy Williams impression. (UNC basketball coach.)

8:19 PM: BANG BANG!!! Again: BANG! The race begins … 10 hurdles must be jumped over … somebody FALLS on the first hurdle! A Kenyan FALLS also! Winner is Henova, from the nation of CZE, followed by Brown of USA.

8:18 PM: This is event is the 400M hurdles — NOT a dash as previously reported — it’s hurdles. “God never put a hurdle in my path I couldn’t jump over” –bumpersticker I just invented. BANG and they’re off…

8:17 PM: How do you feel about track and field? It’s one of the hottest sports, and we’re definitely about to see some of it, courtesy of the Olys. Here’s T’erea Brown, about to compete in her first Olys. She’s running a dash!

8:15 PM: Now we’re watching a commercial about baseball games.

8:09 PM: Enough about this guy with the special legs. I wanna see some live sports! This might be the only night I can see the Olys. Bring on the live feed from London!

8:07 PM: Can’t believe I’m actually watching the Olys! I’ve been hearing about them for more than a week and now I’m finally getting to see them for myself. This woman interviewer has got mad crazy teeth; she seems cool.

8:06 PM: My dad is looking up the correct spelling of Verrazano (?) Bridge in his Encyclopedia Britannica. Now we’re watching a report about Oscar Pastorious (?). He’s drinking a weird green milkshake with plants in it.

8:05 PM: We’re all talking about stuff while commercials play on TV. “Olympics memories are made of this.”

8:02 PM: Wu Minxia wins a gold medal! In high-dive jumping! (I’m watching the Olys at my parents’ house; they have a high-def TV!)

8:01 PM: Ladies and gentlemen: It’s the Olymics! And only mnftiu.cc has all your liveblog needs! We’re watching ladies’ diving, which only happens once every 4 years!