Live from the Glastonbury Music Festival:
You know, I went to the Glastonbury Festival way back in olden times. The Velvet Underground played a reunion show. BORRRRING! Why does everyone think that band was so great? “Let’s plonk around on two notes and sing through our noses while Andy Warhol films a skyscraper for twenty hours.” WAY TO ROCK, GUYS.
If I had a choice between seeing a Velvet Underground reunion show and a “The Guy In This Video” reunion show, I would be choosing the latter faster than you can say, “Drank a whole bottle of Cabernet for breakfast,” which is obviously what he did.
(Only six contestants this week, because I’m behind schedule.)