Best quote of the weekend! From Bill Scher of LiberalOasis:
I don’t believe there is “secret racism” in this election. I don’t think there is “secret racism” not being picked up by the polling. There is loud and proud racism. But it is in a hateful corner of the country. And quite frankly, I love it to see it. Your hate, people, is my food. Please — give me more. I don’t care if the price of orange juice is going up; I can drink on your hate. I look forward to the day when Barack Obama is president, so I can watch your heads explode.
If you’re the hottest new blogger on the scene, with the hottest new book out that everybody’s buying fifty copies of, you vote by absentee ballot because you don’t know where you’ll be on Election Day. You might be giving a prestigious lecture at some Ivy League college . . . you might be on an island with Jay-Z and Bill Gates, schooling them on how to blog . . . you just don’t know.
So you vote ahead of time.
Which I did this morning.
Just to confirm: The Illinois senator’s name is on the ballot. This is totally happening.
(By the way, most anticlimactic moment of my life? YES. But if we’ve learned one thing this year, it’s that you win the game by keeping your head down and executing your strategy. Save the butterflies for the after-party.)
This dude should change his name to “Destroyer McJaunty,” because he freakin’ destroys this jam and kicks the jauntiness factor up to +12,000%.
That piano lick would make an AWESOME sample. In fact, right before I researched this video I was researching the video for “My Block” by Scarface; do you remember how sick that Donny Hathaway piano loop was? This kid is dealing with something on that level of unstoppability.
(By the way, I only wish his arms weren’t so short and stubby, LOL are you sure they’re long enough to reach the piano keyboard, LOL, because they’re pretty short, could you put the piano in the next room and he’d still be able to play it, LOL best arms ever this kid is destroying.)
HONORABLE MENTION:
DANGER DANGER
THE GUY WHO
RUNS THE BOWLING ALLEY
HAS GONE CRAZY.
FRIDAY FACE-OFFS! THE WINNING VIDEO IS NEXT!!! YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE YOUR EYES OR EARS, I HAVE UNCOVERED A MASTERPIECE.
When I first read the youtube user’s description of this video:
“Dropped a bomb signing on R. Kelly’s Ignition Remix!!”
I thought I saw a typo. It took me a minute to realize: no typo.
THEN. I. GOT. SAD.
(By the way, this video has some intense, mystifying cutaway shots that make me love it more and more each time I watch it. Hello, 0:58!!!)
BUT THE IMPORTANT THING ABOUT THIS VIDEO IS:
Sometimes I watch this video and focus on the guy in front, to see how R. Kelly is translated into his language (answer: soooooo smoothly). But sometimes, I focus on the guy in the back. And when I do that, I FEEL STRONG JOY.
Could that guy be jamming any harder? I would say that from 2:52 – end, he is manifesting pure light.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH HOW HARD HE’S JAMMING AT THE END???
Bonus points for the ending! LOL, can’t believe you got David Chase to direct your video!
Goddamm, I think I discovered a straight-up classic ass-banger with this one. Fifty thousand gold stars.
(Note: The end of this video features adult language and sexual themes, which are not endorsed or condoned by Friday Face-Offs.)
Greatest crew of all time, right here in this video? YES.
As the video begins, ask yourself: Which member of this crew probably has to take the most abuse from the other two crew members? Just take a WILD guess.
Got your answer? Okay, now watch 1:05 – onwards. Was your guess very correct?
Umm . . . 1:24, anyone?
By the way, is there a SMALL escalation of hostilities on the battlefield? At one point, homeboy has TWO LAUNDRY BASKETS ON HIS HEAD. NOT ONE. TWO.
Also, 1:54 makes me SOOOOO LOL. I know just what that feels like: “Y’know, I should really hit him in the face with a laundry basket. That’s what needs to happen at this point in our friendship.”
Also: 3:00?!? Samurai sword, LOL? But also NOL? (Nervous Out Loud)
You know you’re getting old when you’re trying to astral-project chaperone thoughts at a youtube video:
Guys, please don’t drink too much tonight. You probably have a big test on Monday.
You don’t need to drink to have fun. You just need a sword, a couple laundry baskets, some hot jams, and your crew.
FRIDAY FACE-OFFS! DON’T FORGET THE LAUNDRY BASKETS!!!
Remember everyone, tonight is one of the LAST Brooklyn GYWO events! The entire War on Terror in 30 minutes, told entirely through cartoons! Can it be done? Tonight we find out.
WORD Bookstore
126 Franklin St.
Greenpoint, Brooklyn
7:00 PM (I think maybe it actually starts at 7:30)
Speaking of which, if I had one of those stupid “How-does-the-debate-make-you-feel” dials, it would be PEAKING during the chorus. Seriously, this is a KILLING arrangement of “Ignition (Remix).” These lads put in a little extra effort. THANK YOU.
(Also, they’re in high school, right? Isn’t that what it looks like? In which case, they probably strike a SMALL AMOUNT OF FEAR in the other acts at high school talent shows. And does the piano player sit in the back of English class and make very many jokes about diminished sevenths that nobody else in the class understands???)
