As you may know, I’ve been holding a fundraiser to buy a laptop computer so that I can blog from a boat or even in a tree.

But this news about Robert Gates cutting funds for the F-22 Raptor has got me so upset and so scared for my future (and my children’s future, and their children’s children’s future’s future) that I’m going to DONATE MY FUNDS TO THE F-22.

Think about it: If we lose the F-22 Raptor, we will no longer have a fighter jet named after the raptor, which (if you saw Jurassic Park, you know) was the toughest, most deadliest and dangerous dinosaur of them all!

How will we strike fear in the hearts of North Korea’s missiles without the Raptor? I don’t know about you, but if I was a North Korean missile, I wouldn’t be scared of some wimpy jet called an F-22 Brontosaurus Leaf-Eater, or whatever. In fact, I’d be excited to chase after that plane and blow it up! Whereas, an F-22 Raptor? No way. I would hide in my missile silo, no matter how hard Dear Leader pressed the red button.

Please, won’t you help keep the F-22 flying high and proud?

THANK YOU